might be just me though, but when i ■■■■ i seem to feel hungry afterwords 
commonrail:
Muckaway:
cheekymonkey:
Well, yes, I do ■■■■ in the cab.
Although its probably illegal to do so while the vehicle is either moving or on hammers, so I try and limit them to when on a break.I believe to say “more tea vicar?” rectifies the situation…
“well held sir” or “good shot sir” said in a w.g.grace voice whilst doffing ones cap are also permitable
Raspy ones should be retorted with “Said Thomas to Gordon as he shunted the coal trucks.”
When shunting, my favourite trick is to pull a motor off a bay for a driver who I know is waiting, and then drop a stench before closing the cab door and shutting it in. Good in summer when it festers in the heat before they get in.
i save my repellant guffs for the transport office
commonrail:
i save my repellant guffs for the transport office
I drop them in there too, they usually gain an appreciative audience.
ha ha…especially pleasing if one of the office bods are having lunch 
If a certain manager is on I always go and visit him when I arrive and drop one. I know he likes it.
Hilarious thread…
jimboy124:
After double manning with a member on here… All I will say is that his diet of cheese, cabbage and beer finally ended our marriage .
I’m more than a little proud to say that I did actually make his eyes water with one particularly fine ■■■■. It was noisy, so he knew it was going to be bad for him as it made it’s way toward the passenger seat, but at 56mph on the elevated section of the M6 between J6 and J5 there was not a ■■■■ thing he could do about it. Good times.
jimboy124:
After double manning with a well respected member on here… All I will say is that his diet of cheese, cabbage and beer finally ended our marriage .
chicken tonite,coolmints and peanuts do it for me
commonrail:
jimboy124:
After double manning with a well respected member on here… All I will say is that his diet of cheese, cabbage and beer finally ended our marriage .chicken tonite,coolmints and peanuts do it for me
Peanuts then ■■■■■■■? You like to live life on the edge eh?
oh yes,one life…live it
Hiya…now …now… that ■■■■■■■ is’nt aloud in Halcion lorries from stoke… a pal of mine got a job their
many years ago… they give him a sheet of A4 with do’s and don’t numbered from 1 to 24…
about no9 was …flatulence must be kept to a minium and should be release before
entering the cab…i 'am not jokeing…must say it was a s…t firm in my book
John
Nothing better than dropping one…while in bed… And then grabbing the covers and pulling them over the wifes head…
I call it Foreplay…
When I was shovel driving, the other shovel op stood on the bonnet, dropped his keks and lit a ■■■■…I nearly buried the lorry cab with ballast I was ■■■■■■■ myself
Coffeeholic:
jimboy124:
After double manning with a member on here… All I will say is that his diet of cheese, cabbage and beer finally ended our marriage .I’m more than a little proud to say that I did actually make his eyes water with one particularly fine ■■■■. It was noisy, so he knew it was going to be bad for him as it made it’s way toward the passenger seat, but at 56mph on the elevated section of the M6 between J6 and J5 there was not a ■■■■ thing he could do about it. Good times.
That ■■■■ would of made a fly spew up !!
I have actually enabled myself to have smell memory …
Great times they were mate…
However my new double man partner lifts his arse of the seat and say " squirrels " … I have no idea why he does this , but he is a scout leader …
ah no the silent ones are the best sometimes, just let it slip out when your out in the car with mrs and kids and blame one of them, normally lasts for 30 seconds before i crack up laughing 
Wicked I know, but if I’m in a shop and there’s an OAP in a wheelchair, I’ll stand nearby, creep one out and walk away…Alarms the carer when they return.
jimboy124:
However my new double man partner lifts his arse of the seat and say " squirrels " … I have no idea why he does this , but he is a scout leader …
He’s grooming you.