Working for coop, normally on artics doing trunking, came in one morning to be greeted with the news that I had a shop run in a rigid, 1st time for about a year. Oh well, get on with it. Once sussed out roughly how to drive the rigid, especially reversing went on my merry way. At about the 4th drop, thought, ah, done this shop before, turns up the tight turn up hill, waits for a few cars to move so can pull into car park (small) and then spends 15 mins carefully manoevering truck so the back is close to the ‘loading bay’ - involving numerous shunts round the parked cars. Loading bay is one of them raised affairs. Eventually gets set, and dead proud that done it without hitting anything, bangs back door, and starts to unload the 4 or 5 cages. No reply, bangs again, and someone opened up, looked at me a bit strange, and asked what I thought I was doing. They then said they had had their delivery, was this supposed to be to the other coop in the town, 400 yards away, round the corner! Loaded back on again, and away all sheepish, and then another 15 mins shunting to get out of car park again. (deliveries apparently normally 6am when car park empty). Wont make that mistake again - Church Road and Church Street sort of similar.
Whilst on containers, got a job to Chelsea Football club. 20 footer full for the club shop. So off i went, got there, asked the security man, he knew nothing, so i showed him the text and instructions i’d been given. Definitley not at Chelsea he said, probably the training ground at Cobham. Rang the boss, he rang the firm we pulled for, and no, it wasn’t Chelsea or Cobham. It was actually a warehouse near Heathrow where they store all the club shop stuff until it’s needed. Was booked for 9am, got there a 3pm. The bods at the warehouse had been there since 8 waiting for me…luckily they’d been told about the ■■■■ up, and made me a brew when i turned up. 
Not too long ago phoned in for backload told to load 10pallets from Warrington to go to Brighouse me being in S.E. London at the time,nothing new about the distance & time travelled. Sets of got to Oxford svs 45m break shower and eats, thought better phone in get address for loading to find its Wellington in Somerset load in morning. Phew glad I checked that out anyway gets to address in Wellington only to find the 10pallets is exactly 1 stack of 10pallets all neatly stacked and banded together and this is in an artic!!
Kenny nearly 50 years ago I picked up a load off the Royal Dock in Grimsby for Bootle, next day bright and early I am driving up and down the docks around Liverpool looking for West ■■■■■■■■■■ Farmers which surprise surprise is in ■■■■■■■■■■ 
oh silly me read the full address. Regards Big Al
When I worked on the ford contract out off Birmingham I remember when you went to the transport office you were given an a4 brown envelope with your paperwork and your trailer number and they would say dagenham, halewood or wherever.One night agency lad came in to the office and was given the brown envelope and the keys to the unit and told to give the envelope to the shunter when he gets to Southampton.He got to Southampton and the shunter asked him where he had dropped the trailer and the reply was what trailer 
When I worked on the ford contract out off Birmingham I remember when you went to the transport office you were given an a4 brown envelope with your paperwork and your trailer number and they would say dagenham, halewood or wherever.One night agency lad came in to the office and was given the brown envelope and the keys to the unit and told to give the envelope to the shunter when he gets to Southampton.He got to Southampton and the shunter asked him where he had dropped the trailer and the reply was what trailer
I almost took an artic home after a trunk from grangemouth to traff park on way back up came of at larbert got 2 streets away from my house then realised what I’d done. Won’t be doing that again any time soon
Went to perelli in carlise via gretna green other day! Was advised to take j45 and follow signs for workington to miss the city centre… he meant J43… had the boss on the phone as i just passed the sign Welcome to scotland gretna green and thought to my self something isnt right here! … what you doing in (insert many expletives) gretna green!
Wasnt a happy bunny as i ended up 45 mins late for the load!
Many moons ago I was a driver for Parceline and my little area was Ivybridge, Lee Mill, Plymstock and Plympton.
We used to collect these huge boxes from Peco in Beer and take them to a small transport company on Lee Mill for delivery on the continent.
One day I had about 8 of these huge boxes to deliver. Right PITA as they took up half the van and I couldn’t wait to get rid of them. Made my way round to Lee Mill and started to off load them in the yard onto a pallet, the same as I had done countless times only to be told by gaffer to go away in small, jerky movements as he will never deal with that company again.
Bugger! 
Back on the van.
I took them for a nice ride around Plymstock and Plympton before I read the address on the ticket. Turns out they were going to another transport company on Lee Mill!
i went to the wrong place once
picked up a load
eventually got given an address and told to be there on time
got there an it was a church in my local area
had an hours induction by this guy telling me how the job was to be done an he mentioned summat about till death do u part
took me 24 years to unload that one
Too embarrassing to tell full story, happened 15 years ago. You know when you have been somewhere a lot and you jump to conclusions, particularly when taking instructions by phone.
There is apparently a small coastal village called “Wells-next-the-Sea” in Norfolk. There is also a much better known cathedral city called Wells in Somerset.
Guess which one I went too and which one I was supposed to go to…
Hands up who has done it ?
I did it the other week, had two store deliveries Linlithgow and Denny. Then was told to pick up a load out the diaries afterwards.
Everytime i go to the diaries its always Kingdom in Cowdenbeth, so blasted out to Kingdom Diaries got there at 5pm sitting at 4hr 15min on the tachograph thought nice one. Can load the truck, then sit outside the place have my 45mins.
Got into the diaries guy said no we have done all your loads for the day, i start to argue showing him the paper work which says Bridge of Allan “doh”.
The second i get back to the truck the phone is ringing boss is saying your at Kingdom arent you, i said yeah, he said get to Bridge of Allan ASAP can’t send anyone else they are meant to close at 5.30pm but will wait for you, i said more good news i need to take a 45min break.
Got to Bridge of Allan at nearly 7pm, thought staff in there would go mental they had a good laugh about it, (i prob got them some extra OT). Back at the depot expected the boss to go mental and was ready for it, but instead just looked disapointed which was worse, saying you really made an arse of things, have had to hold back the trunks !
First time ive ever done anything like that closest ive got to it was doing a night trunk to Warrington for months then got changed to going to Aberdeen one night, from the south side of Glasgow. Hit the M74 and was in Warrington mode, drove past the the M73 junction and clicked wasnt to bad turned round at the Raith and back.
Anyone else made a right arse of themselves and gone to the wrong place.
yep,ive done it quite a few times,the most memorable one though(and i still do it now),is taking volvos to maidstone instead of maidenhead and vice versa doh!
A few years ago we had a casual driver in as holiday cover, at the time we were running into the docks at Sheerness on a regular basis so this guy’s first job of the week was to run down on the sunday for a tip first thing on monday.About 9am on the monday my phone goes, this is the conversation.
driver-- where’s the docks in sheerness I’ve been driving about for an hour and i cant find them?
me – how the hell can you not find them, the only thing in sheerness is the docks .
driver – I’ll stop and ask somebody.
5 minutes later the phone goes again
driver – I think i’ve made a blunder , I know why i cant find the docks, I’m not in Sheerness I’m in Skegness
I dont no what was worst for the guy , the slagging he took from me and the other drivers or the swearing he got from the boss. 
alfa man:
driver – I think i’ve made a blunder , I know why i cant find the docks, I’m not in Sheerness I’m in SkegnessI dont no what was worst for the guy , the slagging he took from me and the other drivers or the swearing he got from the boss.
Easy mistake to make, and there is much more to do in Sheerness
Wasn’t me, honest, but an old couple called in our workshop one day for directions.
Can you tell me if I am on the right road to Preston? Aye lad, go on for about 19 miles and through Hull, follow the signs for the docks, just don’t turn off that road till you get to the BP factory.
Is that back towards Blackpool?
Er No!
Turns out these 2 pillocks had left the Lancaster area heading for their sons house in Preston. They had driven almost 2 hours across the Pennines on the M62.
No it wasn’t me honest.
A long time ago I did some agency work at weekends for Sainsbury’s and was asked to do a 3 a.m. start one Saturday morning to Stockport which was only a half an hour drive away. When I arrived there I backed onto the bay and rang the bell, the back dock waller came out and said I was early and told me to get my head down. As it was a brand new E.R.F. sleeper cab there was no problem there. After ten minutes there was a knock on the cab and some body wanted to check the paperwork after the week befores ■■■■ up.
It seems that after they had unloaded the trailer and the load didn’t tally somebody finally realised that the load was actually marked Sainsbury’s Southport .
I didn’t go to Newton Abbot instead of Barnstable
wibble:
I didn’t go to Newton Abbot instead of Barnstable
understandable mistake as both sound so similar.
We had an agency driver come in one night and had the easiest job going. From our place at Kings Cross to Liverpool St station, about 15 mins from our place. He was asked if he needed a map, no he knew where it was so off he went. About three hours later there’s a phone call from him, “I’m on the hard shoulder of the M6. I’ve run out of diesel!” Office bod-“WTF are you doing on the M6?” Agency driver-“I’m heading for Liverpool like you said?”
myself a similar thing… i had 7 deliverys to starting from leeds at 1am first drop at south wales at some printers dufryn ind est or something anyway ending up with last drop reels of cable for bristol. i ended up at a cable place i always used to go to at yate instead of a cable place near the severn bridge.