I’ve always moaned about not having a decent time off over Xmas,normally just end up with a couple/3 days if I’m lucky depending on how my rota falls.
I have been to docs this morning to get signed off work for the forseeable as my wife had pains in her side a cpl of months ago,she was referred to the hospital and after scans/tests and visits to Birmingham liver hospital yesterday we have been told they are 95% sure she has liver or bile duct cancer and they will operate on the 4th Jan to removed a large tumour (2.5kg approx) from her liver and then be allowed time for her body to recover from this operation before starting chemotherapy,we have also been told by the surgeon yesterday that there is a 10% chance she won’t survive the op,the first date for the op offered was Xmas but we have a 8 year old son and after the op my wife will spend 3 days in intensive care so my son wouldn’t of been able to see her on Xmas day which we decided was not the best for neither him or my wife.
As said I used to moan about not having time off at Xmas,right now I’d happily work 24 hrs on Xmas day in exchange for what’s ahead of us,after Xmas day we are going to sit out son down and tell him what’s going on as he knows so far that mummy has been to the hospital a lot of times lately but he isn’t aware of the real reason,my wife is 36.
Enjoy whatever time you have with loved ones over Xmas guys,having a few weeks off ain’t all that it’s cracked upto be.
Wish you good luck and hope everything to be OK. Have a joyful and happy Christmas.
Think only positive during the holiday and the surgery, everything will be alright.
P.S. If this brings any comfort at moments like this, let me share a news from few years ago. Doctors in Burgas,BG were able to remove 15kg. ovarian cancer from 42 years old British tourist, the woman is alive and well according to media.
Sorry to hear of your current situation.
This wont help at all, in fact nothing will help much until you receive the news that your wife has the all clear, but here goes anyway.
I too almost lost my wife who suffered complications with a sist on the lung many moons ago. The fear of losing the one I love hit me so hard in the stomache it was like a blow from Tyson (Mike, not the squeaky voice one).
Anyway in one fell swoop everything in life was put into perspective, family is everything and even if it felt a bit selfish that I was suffering with worry my main focus was the wife, endless hospital visits, sleepless nights, tearful moments etc but nothing else mattered but my partner. I was pretty useless at work as the relevence of delivering some machine to a building site was not important to me. In the end my place let me have time off, well they had no choice.
As im sure yours will mine got better and even though we have our ups and downs I never forget the feeling of almost losing her.
90% chance of survival is great odds especially from a surgeon, so look forward to the time everything is OK even in those moments when you only feel like looking at the negative.
If I may, try not to give your young un to much to deal with, ‘mummy is poorly’ should do for now. Take each day as it comes and cherish your time together which will probably be another 50years anyway.
You will need to be her strength in this time as well, try not to be upset in her presence, make sure everythings fine at home and your lads getting looked after and is not upset to much either.
But these are just words, just being there for her and a hand to hold through the dark times is sometimes all we can do. But that can make all the difference.
Thanks for your kind words guys,we have been waiting/hoping for some good news but unfortunately everytime we go the hospital we seem to be greeted with more bad news.
They told us yesterday that the tumour is very close to the main artery/vein going into the lung which is a concern for the surgeon but we have been assured that we are in the hands of one of the best surgeons in this field in the country but we have been told that all he can do is his best,we have to hope that’s enough.
There is a chance that that they will open my wife up and find that they are unable to operate as the scans only show so much until they see it first hand they can’t see everything,if it is that they can’t operate then all they can do is try to slow it down with treatment.
We are both trying to remain positive but there is the odd dark moment which I guess is inevitable I guess,when we first went to hospital for a endoscopy we were told it was just a small hernia that was causing the pain,given some tablets and sent on our way,they somehow missed the large tumour but I’m not looking for someone to blame we are just glad of the NHS and they have been brilliant from the second this became apparent that it is more than first thought.
Feel for you and your family mate. At these difficult times you need to stay strong for her and all rally around and be there for her as it may sound a simple thing but having the right mindset and trying to stay positive does help against the fight. No doubt you and your partner have all our best wishes for the future on here.
best of luck … hope it turns out to be less serious than you are thinking … my heart goes out to you and your wife, I wouldn’t know where to begin dealing with something like that.
Chris mate that is ■■■■ news.
I know how I felt when we thought my wife had breast cancer, that was bad enough, so I can only imagine what you and your wife are going through.
I know it’s an old cliche, but it IS marvellous what they can do nowadays with medical science.
Keep thinking positive, it does help, Good luck from me to you both mate.
blimey - best wishes and fingers crossed it all works out, as others have said nothing I can write will help but I know 2 people one who is 28 and went through cancer this year, despite losing her hair due to the chemo (which seemed to be the main thing she struggled with) she has come through so it can be done.
Absolutely awful,don,t really know what to say Chris,
If you need anything over the next few weeks like lifts or anything practical drop me a pm and if i can help out i will,i believe your in Stoke Chris,i,m at Trentham so don,t be shy even if its just a bit of shopping you need fetching in,
God Bless mate.
and best wishes 