My favourite is it’s illegal to have 9 off at base
scanny77:
It is legal to run at up to 10% overweight (which a driver needed a calculator for to check 10% of 44T)
Vehicle overweight by Penalty
5% to 10% £100
10% to 15% £200
15% to 30% £300
More than 30% Court summons
Copied from gov website so I’m guessing they don’t care about 5%. 
You have to able to stand upright in cab,if you can’t it is against the law to use that vehicle for nights out!
I’m order to sleep in a cab you must be 6 feet from the steering wheel.
The-Snowman:
htmldude:
Albeit an emergency shower if you get covered in the horrific chemicals.I bet there’s still a sign saying drivers aren’t allowed to use it
the nodding donkey:
The-Snowman:
htmldude:
Albeit an emergency shower if you get covered in the horrific chemicals.I bet there’s still a sign saying drivers aren’t allowed to use it
I bet one already has and left a turd on the floor!
war1974:
the nodding donkey:
The-Snowman:
htmldude:
Albeit an emergency shower if you get covered in the horrific chemicals.I bet there’s still a sign saying drivers aren’t allowed to use it
I bet one already has and left a turd on the floor!
The sad thing is that this is not even in jest…
Once had a driver tell me I should have an Adr because I was carrying camping gas canisters for my little portable cooker…
I said oh I better tell the wife then,he said why, I said because she brings them home from town on the bus so she better make sure the bus driver has got adr licence.
He looked puzzled and then said yeah I never thought of that he will need adr 
Complete tool,
Unfortunate that the always seem to want to talk to me
If you’re parked at birchanger services overnight, and the planes for stansted keep you awake, ring vosa and they will get them diverted. I started this rumour with a very gullible colleague a couple of years back, and a few months later heard it back from another direction from somebody whose mate had done it…
If you run out of hours on your way back to base, they can send someone out in a van to take the lorry back while you drive home in the van, so long as you don’t get paid for the time.
mick.mh2racing:
I’m order to sleep in a cab you must be 6 feet from the steering wheel.
“In order to leave the driving industry, you’ve got to be 6 feet under the ground.”
yorkshire terrier:
Once had a driver tell me I should have an Adr because I was carrying camping gas canisters for my little portable cooker…
I said oh I better tell the wife then,he said why, I said because she brings them home from town on the bus so she better make sure the bus driver has got adr licence.
He looked puzzled and then said yeah I never thought of that he will need adr
Complete tool,
Unfortunate that the always seem to want to talk to me
How come one doesn’t need an ADR to carry a bottle full of ■■■■, that being a nasty chemical that one can make phosphorous out of, an even more toxic dangerous chemical. 
Santa:
If you run out of hours on your way back to base, they can send someone out in a van to take the lorry back while you drive home in the van, so long as you don’t get paid for the time.
I couple of years ago a mate ran out of hours so they sent a pool car out with a driver in the passenger seat. He brought the truck back and the office bod brought the car back. My mate was left at the side of the road because both were company vehicles. While they were technically right to point this out, it shows what an arse they made of it when the law was written
The Law states that if you can’t get parked within 20ft of a toilet then you are allowed to have a p*ss on your ( or anyone elses ) wheels !!
and if its a number 2 then discretion is advised !!
The best one i heard not to long ago was in tesco livingstone .For every minute your over 4.5 hours its £60 per minute some drivers do talk alot of bs.
These blokes that make this bull crap up have got a type of mental illness in my opinion because they invent stuff they actually believe.
I once told our resident bull crapper I was leaving for another job,he asked where you going so I made up a firms name…roger Joan’s transport I said,oh,he replied my mate works there they run bent and are on rubbish money etc etc.
So this bloke has an imaginary mate at an imaginary firm and he knows all about the imaginary firm…
Drivers are allowed by law to urinate against any of the nearside wheels.
mick.mh2racing:
Drivers are allowed by law to urinate against any of the nearside wheels.
And anyone not doing so is carving the job up. I heard if you pee offside your gay, like the rule on ear piercings.
switchlogic:
Tho I think my favourite is still the £10/20/30 fine per wind of landing leg handle
In low or high gear? Because that could make a big difference…
Love these hahahaha… I’ve heard them all. Love to go at chat in waiting rooms to listen to these
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