Well…what a day!! 
Got to the yard a 06:30, opened up…unlocked wagon…gear in the bunk…night heater…key in ignition…jump out to check the fluids etc. before cranking and completing the ‘dailies…door swings shut and I hear…‘click…clunk’…No; Surely not■■?..But, Oh yes!!..The friggin’ central locking had locked me out!! Frantically checked N/S door…No go - Locked tighter 'n a ducks ■■■■!!..“Oh Dearie me!”…or words to that effect! LOL
Call TM…“Guess what!”…proceed with explanation…“Wasn’t anything I did Guv…Honest!” I think I hear him choking …turns out he was trying his utmost not to laugh…“Yeah, we’ve had that problem with a couple of our MAN ‘artic’ units in the past couple of months…To be honest we were wondering, amongst ourselves, just how long it would be 'til yours did it to you!”…Charming!! 
“Hold tight. Will get on the blower to Hill Hire and have them drop off the spare key. Call you right back”…“Cheers Boss!” What a way to start what was gonna be a long day anyway!
45 agonising minutes later…“Hello mate. Errrrm…Minor glitch…Apparently the spare keys to that unit are in Northampton!!..Be back to you in a few minutes.” WTF!!
Finally he calls back…“Right…Hill Hire has an 18 tonne ‘curtainsider’ in Spalding…Nip up there and pick it up…Should not be too much of a delay as your ‘track pickup’ is just around the corner from their depot. They will sort the key situation by the end of the day.”
“Roger…Wilco!” And off to Spalding we trot. Pick up the wagon and park Rob’s car in their yard…
Literally around the corner is the Agricultural Equipment dealer where we are scheduled to pick up the tracks…So, off we go…
Loads of room to swing round in their yard…that makes a change…and pull up beside the pile of ‘tracks’. Blimey they look heavy and awkward! I open up the curtain and a nice fella shows up and jumps into a ‘Reach truck forklift’…“have these loaded for you in a jiffy, mate!”…Nice one!! For axle weight reasons we decide upon six towards the front and the remaining ten over the rear axle…
It is 9:15 by now and by 9:30 the front six are loaded…“Jolly good”, I say to Rob. “We can still be out of here by 10:00 and should be able to make the rest of the day work out”.
09:30:01 The ‘Reach Truck’ shuts down with it’s forks under track number 7 and out jumps the fella!..Seeing my bemused expression, he says, “Tea break mate.” I swear you could hear a simultaneous cacophony of clangs as tools were downed all over the huge workshop!! Off to the canteen they all bugger…lined up like ducklings in a row!..LOL
To be fair, he did make us a lovely cuppa and tell us to “Join us in 'ere mate…Luvvly and warm!”…So in we trudge!
20 minutes later they ‘waddle’ out in ones and twos…much more slowly than they went in…LOL
By 10:30 the remaining 10 ‘tracks’ are loaded and I fasten the curtain and give them the bill for £1400!! They don’t even bat an eyelid! “How much do these things cost new?”, I ask one of the salesmen hanging around…just over £5000 a piece he says…Blimey!!
Anyway…The bill is sorted, paperwork complete and away we go…On the way out I pass a stack of brand new tracks all nice and neatly folded and ‘palletised’…“Wouldn’t it have been nice if these were like that?”, I say to Rob…“No chance mate…we could’nt be that friggin’ lucky!”…I get the feeling that he is not a totally happy chappy and that discontent may be brewing on Planet Rob!!..Little did I know …Sometimes, I hate it when I’m right!!..Not that it happens that often, mind you…
LOL
The farm is only 9 miles away so we arrive there by about 10:45.Park it sideways to allow the reach truck easy access and wait for our yardman to unload…And wait…And wait…And wait some more… 
Eventually, after much ‘faffing around’, he decides what he wants to do and starts unloading…
An hour and a half later…FFS!!..He’s still at it!!..He does’nt want to get them “muddy”…The whole yard is 6" deep in the stuff for God’s sake!!..
Finally; after making a sort of ‘nest of pallets’ for them he finishes offloading and we button up and head to Norwich for two pickups (About 150 and 200 tyres respectively say the ‘sheets’)…It is now about 1:00 and Norwich is 81 miles and almost 2 hours away…And then we are supposed to go to Bury (46 miles from Norwich and then 80 miles back to the farm) and pick up 250 more
By now Rob is getting ‘pink edges’ on his ears and I fear an ‘erruption’ is brewing…LOL
We reach the first pickup in Norwich at 2:50. During the ride, he is definitely ‘steaming’!!..“What time you reckon we’ll get done?”, he asks through tightly gritted teeth!..“I reckon 30 mins to load these…20 mins to second pickup…45 mins to load…1 hour to Bury…45 mins to load… two hours backto the farm…An hour to unload then 20 mins to Spalding to turn in the truck.” I reply. “That’ll put us back in Hill Hire’s yard by about 10:15 to 10:30”. I add, bracing for the explosion!!..
And Oh Boy did he ever!..10 mins later, I had heard extensive coverage of the suspect parentage of the TM’s and anatomically interesting places where the job and the truck could be inserted along with various other extreme ■■■■■■ practices that could be practised by said TM’s…Wife going ape…missing of baby daughter…quality of family life being relegated to nothing…more ■■■■■■ practices…more about grief from the ‘trouble and strife’…worringly bizarre ■■■■■■ innovations and habits of various company personell…You get the idea!! I think he actually took a breath or two somewhere in there, but by God it wasn’t many!!..LOL
Of course, me being me; I just had to say, in my best Michael Winner voice, “Calm down Dear…”
Oh crap!!..Mistake!!.. Aaaaaand…Off we went again…“Calm down my ■■■!! My wife…The TM…No mention of 'slavery at the interview!!”…various and sundry cusswords…
Cupping my hands round my mouth, I yell…“WHOA NELLY!!!”…He stops mid-rant…The silence is almost deafening! LOL
I calmly explain to him that I cannot work beyond 9:30 and that I can only do that sort of day twice in a week…regulations…tacho laws…blah de blah de blah…“We will not be going to Bury.”, I tell him. “We will have to get that one tomorrow.” I say that we’ll finish the pickups in Norwich then head back to the farm and then Hill Hire to pickup his car…Should be there no later than 7:00 pm at the latest. Not so bad hey?
He calms down a bit…We ‘hustle’ and chuck the tyres on in about 20 mins…Not…150 but 235!! …Sort out paperwork and zip off to the second pickup in Norwich. We arrive at about 3:30…Lo and behold, it’s not 200, but 300+ tyres…Vesuvius begins to ‘rumble’ anew…
Sorry guys, Too knackered to finish tonight. Will write Part two ‘The rest of the story’ tomorrow evening…If y’all wanna hear it!
Assuming I m not killed in another eruption tomorrow, that is!!
LOL
Night
keep up the good work
of all the trucks I’ve driven since passing in may last year, the Daf’s have been by far the most comfortable and user friendly.
